A Rain of Tears

Spiritual Lessons

A Rain of Tears

A rain of tears

A soul that's drenched

Rent and wrung to dry

A promised hope

So far away

A silenced heart that cries

Here to storm 

the gates of Hell

but turn around to see

An empty field

Without a friend

All swords turned towards me

A tension taut

Against the soul

Ills that haunt me still

Unstable, change

alone, goodbyes

Words that mean to kill

Defenseless with

An unknown grief

Pretend that it's okay

A wound to mourn

A dream to yearn

A voice that must be stayed

I turn to One 

Who knows my heart

And loves to defend

Be not afraid

Rejoice in Him

A faithful, caring Friend

All for good

He will mold 

Every wound and pain

My heart prepared 

All fallow ground

Broken for the rain

A rain of tears

A soul that's drenched

Rent and wrung to dry

A promised hope 

Not far away

A healing heart He'll bind

T.L.H.

Quote of the Day

"A root set in the finest soil, in the best climate, and blessed with all that sun and air and rain can do for it, is not in so sure a way of its growth to perfection, as every man may be, whose spirit aspires after all that which God is ready and infinitely desirous to give him. For the sun meets not the springing bud that stretches towards him with half that certainty, as God, the source of all good, communicates Himself to the soul that longs to partake of Him."
( WM. Law, Daily Strength for Daily Needs p.7) 

Silly Scribbles/ An Open Door with Confidence

Silly Scribbles
#3

~ Or Life as Toni ~

Just recently I started a little series of writings that I titled “Silly Scribbles” or “Life as Toni”.  I began posting them on a private writing club that I joined.  I received such positive feedback I decided to be be brave and share with my Maid Arise readers.  

So often the writer in me throbs and insists, but my current work in progress is strictly grammatical at this point and my creative juices feel cramped and unjustly squelched. So I have decided to allow these juices passage and wait to see what comes of it. I decided to share my experiences with you. Sometimes my life can be quite humorous to the point of disbelief which I have come to accept as normal.... or sometimes I learn new things about myself or little lessons God teaches through the inevitable we've fondly labeled “life”. I hope that these shared stories and bearings of the soul are somehow a blessing, or in the least, a few minutes of entertainment.

An Open Door with Confidence

***

I froze mid step and stopped breathing. Yes, there it was again, the distant rumble of a vehicle. Fear rushed over me like a thousand biting needle points and my heartbeat raced away with my reason. I couldn't stand there just gripping my pathetic little pepper spray and wait for it. Springing like a deer I fled into the dense tree line that followed our dirt road. Crashing through brush and anything that stood in my way I ran to a little indent in the earth under a large tree and stopped to listen once more, like hunted prey. The forest stood silent except for my heavy breathing. The rain ladened pine slowly dripped on my face. I was shaking. And I felt like an idiot – no one was coming. It was all my imagination.

***

I had taken every rebuke. The just and unjust. I was told I was inefficient. Told I lacked confidence. Told I was inept. I was lectured, ridiculed, and belittled. Every day I cried out to the Lord for peace and joy and comfort. It would come, but only to be swept away every time I went to work. And now she stood there, her blue eyes piercing into my soul, knowing she had just offered the ultimatum. Would I consent to her conditions or not? If I did, I would be making a huge sacrifice, and disobeying my authorities. She knew that. But then to refuse meant I would lose my job, and worse, a friend. I had to decide, but fear pierced my heart and hung like a led weight.

***

These are paragraphs of real incidents of my life. Snippets that describe and define me. I guess you could say I have lived in insecurity for a long time. Something taught me by my experiences. And yet insecurity isn't a cause, but a result. Actually, I haven't lived with insecurity, but have lived without confidence. Without confidence I am left insecure and exposed for fear.

Before any negative experiences happened I already was a timid person. Nothing my parents ever said or did has given me any right to believe that I was less than anyone else. But for some reason I have grown up thinking that I was just below average. And if anyone thought otherwise it was because, somehow or other, I had fooled them. They really didn't know me. If they had seen me struggle over that math problem. Or had seen how long it took me to master the concept in piano. Or watched over my shoulder while I wrote in illegible cursive. The very same math problem my little brother could figure out in a cinch. Or the piano concept that my brother (who didn't take lessons) could conquer effortlessly. Or the same cursive alphabet that my sibling received compliments from my Grandmother for. I knew I could kind of keep up, and for the most part, if no-one watched too closely, I'd kind of mesh in the crowd and my inadequacy would be overlooked.

I tucked that mindset under my arm and set off to accomplish life. And in life I was hunted down and accused and rejected. Unfortunately I gave into my fear. I believed them. Every new door of opportunity was now opened with anxiety. Every expectation of me was something I dreaded messing up. Every employer was someone to be feared. It climaxed after losing my job as caregiver. My little boy I had so dutifully and faithfully guarded was taken away from me as a punishment for something that wasn't my fault. But I was told it was my fault.

After this I would have nightmares. Sometimes they would seem quite unrelated, but looking back I realize it was rejection and fear eating away at me. I lived without confidence. Until a few days ago.

Losing my job happened last Autumn. So my healing has probably been in little steps since then. But it was just a few days ago that I embraced who Jesus has created me to be. I can't even convey to you the simple radiant beauty in this freedom. I have refused to hold onto other's judgments of myself. Jesus gave me Isaiah 30:15 “In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength...” I claimed it. And applied it practically.

In little day to day problems I tried it. I decided to look at my problem confidently, cheerfully, quietly. And it melted away. I could think clearly and the negative emotion disappeared.

So I tried it in “big” problems. This Monday was my first official day of work. I had gone in last week to get acquainted with the overall process of the secretarial motions of Aspen Wellspring (a natural Health clinic). Every time my employer showed me something or spoke to me gently I was overwhelmed with relief. She wasn't upset with me. She didn't find me inefficient.

Now it was my official day. It started off with several extra feet of snow. After an hour and a half of shoveling out the car to no avail, my brother offered to drive me to town in the beat-up truck. The one at the end of our long quarter mile unplowed drive way. And the one without fuel I might add. So after trudging to the pick up we find that the road is hardly navigable. Our neighbor with the plow is doing her best, but as she passes us she leaves behind her a daunting trail with two narrow ruts. Half way down the mountain we get stuck. We had left 45 minutes earlier than we had to, but it took us at least 30 minutes to get unstuck. Normally this would have gotten me quite anxious. What would my boss say? I was sure to be late. But instead I calmly, quietly took my problem with confidence. I knew the Lord knew, and I would do my best with what He allowed.

That's when we ran out of gas. Yep. Three and a half miles from town. Right in the middle of the one lane trail. So Chris pushed the back while I pushed the front and steered. As soon as it would get going down the hill, I would jump in the seat and slam the door shut and Chris would jump in the bed. It would pick up speed for a little ways and then stop. We did this a little ways until we ran out of hill. After that, it wouldn't budge. So down the icy mountain we jogged to town. Normally this would have been my limit. I would be overcome with negative emotions and drained. But I was actually laughing. It was raining, our shoes were soaked and Chris had hurt his knee. He looked over at me as I gingerly jogged alongside him in the ice and he reassuringly declared, “You know, if you fall down on this ice I'm going to laugh my head off!” Huttoesque humor at it's best. When everything falls apart you either laugh or cry. And for the first time in a long time... I was laughing. Confidence.

Since then I've been faced with multiple circumstances that should have left me quaking. But every time there He is, holding my hand and with quietness and confidence I find my strength.

After applying it to my daily lifestyle I finally took my great emotional insecurity by the horns and faced it. What caused me to fear and lack confidence? Some of it stemmed from being chased down by men not so long ago. That really had shaken me and left me afraid to jog or even use public restrooms. But I had conquered this fear with some basic training. It only haunted me now and then.

But I stopped to think when I had started having nightmares and insecurities and being afraid of what others thought. And I pinpointed it's climax. It was when I lost my job last year. It hurt to lose my little boy, but the heaping of untrue perceptions on my head was something I couldn't cope with. It drained me and squeezed my “comfort zone” into a small sphere. I was told I was socially awkward and lacked capability and now everything looked complex and I felt inadequate in everything.

I have to pause to say that I don't believe this was my employers intention. I don't think she lay awake at night planning my emotional destruction. But she allowed her flesh to dictate her attitude and tongue and took it out on the closest defenseless person around. And that happened to be me. Nothing personal. :) But it was my choice to hold onto it. My choice to allow it to dictate my dreams and security and relationships and actions. She was right in one thing: I lacked confidence.

How silly to hold onto other people's garbage! And I have found the key to dumping it! In quietness and confidence I find the strength to cheerfully let go. It's not even taking one day at a time but each new emotion, which can be moment by moment.

My dad just recently left for North Dakota to work a 30 day shift, with 10 days off. I can't even explain how this shakes my world upside down. But this time I tried Jesus' promise. I quietly accepted it, and confidently embraced it. It works! I don't dread anything anymore. Life's problems are God-given circumstances that I can quietly accept and confidently embrace.

This life-long struggle has held me back from blossoming into the person Jesus has wanted me (made me) to be. No Father desires His child to cower and tremble in insecurities. It had gotten out of control. I started feeling inadequate in the things I've previously conquered, not just in new things. Now I can open every door of opportunity wide and confidently step in with a smile on my face.

Thinking highly of yourself can be taken to unhealthy extremes, but it is just as detrimental to think that extremely low of yourself. It's life altering, emotionally and physically. You can probably think of people you know who live like this. I wish I could tell them how beautiful and strong and comforting confidence is. True confidence. And this is found in the Vine. In the all-powerful One who calls me Beloved. In Him is true confidence. He makes it possible to quietly accept anything because anything can be accepted if you believe your life is orchestrated by a Lover who looks to your best interest. With that knowledge tucked under your arm you can be sure to take on Life with confidence.

For the first time in over a year I prayed for my “x” employer. And for my sweet boy. Up until now my insecurity was a sore bereavement on my soul. I even lacked the confidence to talk much about him. But now I can think about him and talk about him, and pray for him and it doesn't hurt. No guilt or fear is associated with him anymore. He is my dear baby again.

I now can shut that door, quietly with peace. It was slammed in my face, but I had never found closure. Now it's done and I'm faced with other doors. I've grabbed the knob. I'm going to swing wide and jump in. Who knows what lays before me? But with Jesus I'm going in with confidence.


Silly Scribble#4 "Starless"

Modesty

Spiritual Lessons/ Health and Beauty 

I would like to submit to you a post written by guest writer Melissa Bickish.  I sincerely enjoyed it and would love to hear what you think!

Modesty 

I recently read a very different book. It was written by a preacher during the 2^nd world war period. He had some amazing things to say from a MAN’s perspective. You don’t often hear a guy’s perspective of modesty, beauty, femininity and purity.  I wanted to share with you some of my favorite quotes. He encouraged me in modesty, keeping a really high-standard, and my already existing convictions against flirtation, etc. I hope that this encourages someone else as much as it did me.  They are kind of random without much order, but what he has to say is very honest and encourages woman to continue in our pursuit of modesty, purity, and feminine beauty.

“ God never made anything so beautiful as a beautiful girl. From her hair, which the Apostle Paul calls her crowning glory, and her eyes, which carry the sparkle of the diamond of god’s sunshine itself, and her beautiful complexion, which is most beautiful when it is healthy and natural; from her teeth, like a row of pearls, to the tip of her dainty feet, as she moves with grace across the path of a young man’s vision, she is altogether adorable. I do not wonder that the young man should fall head over heels in love with such a vision of loveliness.”

“In commenting on present-day laxity of girls regarding their make-up and manners, a college lad recently said, ‘ of course fellows will play around with girls of that kind, but inwardly they despise them’. Far too often in these days, we see girls that by their very actions are labeled ‘cheap’… Any well-bred young man will instinctively lift his hat with reverence and respect, and thus honor modest, sincere, Christian womanhood.”

In speaking of a girl permitting liberties… “ He loses all his former respect for her because she is willing to permit those unbecoming intimacies, and about nine times out of ten he will shortly cast her aside for another. He is probably laughing at her, and is saying to himself that if she permits his advances, she would yield her favors to the approaches of some other young man.”

“ The worthwhile young man is not interested in making his purchases at the counter plainly marked ‘soiled goods’.

“ Every truthful young man would admit that the has the greatest respect for the girl whose general bearing is constantly warning him- not necessarily with words, but by her every act- ‘hands off.’ As one young man expressed it, ‘ Any girl should know that the young man always wants that one which is hardest to get.’

“,,, Therefore it makes little difference whether the physical virginity is lost or not, if that maidenly purity of heart be gone, in the sight of God it is sensuality, and her chastity, the greatest element of a girl’s attractiveness has been destroyed.”

“ There is nothing more disgusting to a worth-while young man than a girl who is ‘boy-crazy’. With her light-headed giggling, squealing, affected and designing maneuvers, she may think she is making a ‘hit’, but in fact she is utterly despised by every decent chap in the community. However, such a girl may be highly attractive to the young fellows who think one so silly might be easy prey to their improper intentions.”

“We find in these days a steady trend to immodesty of dress, and the sad part of it is that most young girls are willfully ignorant of the effect this has upon the men… but I am hereby serving notice on you that the decent, respectable men or our country, whether in the church or out of it, are absolutely disgusted with the manner in which modern women are dressing.” ( This was written in 1938! I can’t even imagine what this man would have said about today’s dress code!!! ) “The partially concealed charms of a woman have always proved to be one of the most severe temptations to sexual immorality that any man has ever been compelled to face.”

 “Women are the best missionaries of the cause of Purity. Just let them make it known that they will refuse to marry men who fail to bring to the bridal chamber the same purity which men expect from womanhood, and it will start the greatest moral revolution since the Reformation.”

“Put your standards high, yield yourself wholly to the will of God and make your future a matter of earnest prayer. You may be sure that God is far more interested in having His divine purpose carried out in your life than you yourself could possibly be…. Certainly God is both able and willing to make his will known to His children, and especially in that which is of such tremendous importance to us both for time and eternity. Let every Christian girl stand her ground and look to God for a perfect fulfillment of His will in her life.

“There are many marriages which God never had anything to do.”

“… next to our conversion and eternal salvation the most important step is that of marriage.”

“Girls don’t let your actions advertise ‘Man wanted quick’ for that is the surest way of not getting a real one. You might get something with pantaloons on, but that is not necessarily a man, let alone being a real gentlemen.”

“ Every worthwhile young man, whether he admits it or not, has the greatest respect for the young woman who lives and dares to stand up and defend her Christian principles.”

~ Oscar Lowry 

Keep the Main Thing, the Main Thing/Abortion

Political/ World Issues 

Recently a Maid Arise reader shared with me how she would like to see more on the Abortion issue.  She also lamented on the fact that there seems to be no Christian resources to glean from on this topic.  I wanted to share something that was written by guest writer Chris Hutto .  Also I would like to share some resources.  Plus if you are interested in other posts on the topic please see the Political/ World Issues  page of this blog!

Keep the Main thing, the Main thing

by Chris Hutto 

I would like to address the opposition we face from Christians for abortion abolition. Some don’t think it's the Christian's job while others just become offended anytime they hear a “thus saith the Lord.” There are many avenues from which other Christians attack the abolition standpoint but really I only want to focus on one of them.

Whenever you do something bold for God you will be criticized. Whenever you stand up for what is right you will be mocked. Whenever you choose which side of the fence to be on and stay on it someone is going to be offended. That's because people don’t like it when someone else rocks the boat. People find comfort in consistency and conformity. It's much safer to agree. It's much easier to passively stand by. But is this the Christian thing to do? 

Some Christians say that we shouldn’t judge people or that we all just need to get along. Some cry, “peace” when there is no peace. Christians were never meant to be silent in the face of evil. We are soldiers and ambassadors. The world craves ambiguity but as Christians we don’t need to fit in. We were never meant to keep our opinions to ourselves. We are taught in society to follow the masses and even those that have promoted individuality through things like media and clothing brands have become the newest fashions and trends. We have become robots in a society of illusions. Everyone claims that they want to be different but insist that no one challenge the world view that has been hand crafted for them by the god of this world.

"Whenever you stand up for what is right you will be mocked. Whenever you choose which side of the fence to be on and stay on it someone is going to be offended. That's because people don’t like it when someone else rocks the boat.”

As Christians we automatically don’t fit in. This isn’t a condemnation or something to be ashamed of. We willingly traded our conformity to the world for the transformation of Christ at the blood stained cross. We throw off the weighty expectations of the world everyday when we pick up our own cross that has also been stained with the blood, sweat and tears of our own ambitions, dreams and desires. We have been crucified with Him. He was crucified outside the camp, why do we deserve any different? We are salt and light. Salt is painful to the stinking wounds of sin. Light is blinding to the inky darkness of evil.

"As Christians we automatically don’t fit in. This isn’t a condemnation or something to be ashamed of. We willingly traded our conformity to the world for the transformation of Christ at the blood stained cross."

 

I said all that to say this --  No matter what you do for God in this world you will be reviled. It was God's plan. Always has been. And it's okay. Both sinner and saint will criticize and complain. Does it change the legitimacy of our cause? No. Should it hinder the work? No. If you stand up against sin the sinner will say you are too judgmental while the saint says you are self-righteous. If you boldly proclaim the truth the sinner will say you are hateful while the saint says you are full of pride. 

Since obeying the great commission and reaching the lost with the Gospel the most hurtful attacks I have experienced against the work have come from fellow Christians; fellow soldiers. It isn’t the homeless drunk that lashes out, he already knows he's a sinner, but the comfortable Christian sitting apathetically in the barracks. Its easy to lob grenades at your own guys while they are fighting the enemy because they have their backs to the comfort of the barracks. They are charging the gates of Hell.

"We have become professional takers.”

The work of abortion abolition is not for the weak. If you are looking for recruits to criticize the guys on the battlefield, you don’t have far to go. The churches are full of them. Not only does the Christian soldier have to deal with the frontal attack of the enemy but the back biting attack of his comrades. The pews have become the comfortable barracks of the Christian army. It has become the mess hall where you never have to leave, only to glut on the abundance of food. We aren’t fed week after week, month after month, year after year to grow fat and lazy. It is better to give than to receive. Our crosses are never for ourselves but for others. 

We have become professional takers. We have mastered the art of cross bearing just enough to hoard the benefits for ourselves. Sitting in church is what a ''good'' Christian is supposed to do. The bearing of our crosses and burdens look so spiritual. But what about giving? What about sharing the good news? What about boldly standing up for truth? Often all you get in return is a mocking stare, an unkind word, a whisper behind your back.

Those whispers become the very flames of discouragement and doubt that destroy the battle ready soldier of Jesus Christ. We are all guilty of this are we not? Gossip and backbiting have become one of those sins that Christians sweep under the rug by adding a bit of humor and a lot of quenching of the Holy Spirit. 

I'm writing this to address one of those sneaky darts that so often pierce the armor-less back of the fighting soldier. I’m writing this both to those that have been hurt by that dart and those that are throwing them, from the shadows of the barracks. There are many darts being thrown around carelessly, but I want to focus on just one of them. 

I call it the, “Keep the main thing the main thing” argument. Many Christians, once they get a preconceived idea about something, paint everything with the same brush. The best way to try and destroy someone’s viewpoint is to build a straw-man argument, paint it with their misinformed, preconceived notion about that argument and than knock it down with skewed logic. By misrepresenting someones position it makes it much easier to attack.

Many Christians, when confronted with the question whether or not they should be actively “delivering those being drawn to death” will say, “keep the main thing the main thing” or something similar. What they are saying is that we shouldn’t be focused on a side issue when we should be spreading the Gospel. It sounds good but it is a straw-man argument. 

In one sense they are right. No matter how many people we convince that abortion is wrong, if they aren’t saved, they will still go to Hell. But do we dismiss the subject in light of their salvation? I believe Christians with this mindset don’t really understand the very Gospel message they are championing as the “main thing.” I'm not saying they aren’t saved but that they missed a vital step in convincing men of sin and leading them to the cross. Does abortion abolition and salvation have to be separate? No. Actually they can't be apart. 

“Man must be convinced by the law that he is a sinner, that he is sick before he will willingly take the cure, Christ's blood atonement.” 

First of all, what is the Gospel message? The death, burial and resurrection of Christ. But how do we convince people that they need it? That is what often is missing. We shouldn’t go up to people and say, “Just turn to Jesus and He will save you.” They will say, “save me from what?” Man must be convinced by the law that he is a sinner, that he is sick before he will willingly take the cure, Christ's blood atonement. 

Was Paul not “keeping the main thing the main thing” when he boldly preached against superstition and idolatry on Mars Hill? If Paul were alive today his fellow comrades would have berated him for preaching against one thing. They would have said he had too narrow of a focus. Why wasn’t he preaching the Gospel and asking if they wanted Jesus to come into their hearts? Because he first had to destroy their false notion of innocence. First he had to convince them of their sin. He had to preach against the wickedness that was dear to their hearts. What is dear to the hearts of the American people? Might it be the idols of convenience and comfort? Maybe its the callousness toward life or the addiction to pleasure. How many babies have been murdered on the alters of these very things? Fifty-six million so far.

"The world doesn’t need anymore cute messages of universal peace and love.”

Humanity must be shaken to the core of its blind ignorance. The world doesn’t need anymore cute messages of universal peace and love. What the world needs is a broken heart. God resisteth the proud but giveth grace to the humble. Did Jesus fail to “keep the main thing the main thing” when He cleansed the Temple? Maybe He was wisely striking at the heart of greed and irreverence. There's no hope until the sickness is revealed and taken seriously.

If attempting to save the lives of innocent babies isn't enough for the dart throwing Christians at the very least I would hope they could see that the abortion issue is often the very means to salvation for a wounded soul. The law must be used before grace is applied but sometimes the conviction of lying and stealing and adultery isn’t enough. I’ve had people proudly proclaim that they were lying, stealing, blasphemous, fornicators at heart. Sometimes we need the indictment of murder to get them to see the light. 

Abortion strikes hard at the soul of humanity. How couldn't it? It is the legal slaughter of children by their own parents. Christianity isn't a spectator sport. Something must be done but if the majority of Christians are content with apathy I would implore them to stay out of the way and sit in the comfort of the barracks and gorge themselves on the meat of the Word. The pews are comfortable. The camp is friendly and inviting. Maybe then in the slumber of inaction and disobedience they will stop throwing darts and hindering the work of the Lord.

Please visit Chris' blog dedicated to abortion: voicesofdissidence.wordpress.com

Quote of the Day

"More and more, I have come to realize that love for my dear Lord and Saviour has to displace all other loves. Nothing else really counts. I must allow His love so to possess me that anything that hurts Him hurts me. Equally, anything and everything that He loves, I am happy to love equally."  (Helen Roseveare) 

A Willing Heart, with a Ready Mind, through an Open Door

Spiritual Lessons

A Willing Heart, with a Ready Mind, through an Open Door

“God will use what you prepare.” I heard that recently in a message I was listening to. It really struck me. I think sometimes we can be lazy with our time and become complacent with the abilities God has given us. We can be guilty of giving little to no thought or effort to the preparation of important things- and expect somehow a good result when the time comes. At least, I know I am. I believe, as Christians, we should have a higher standard. 

Luke 12:48 says- “...For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more.”

Also, I Corinthians 4:2- “Moreover it is required in stewards, that a man be found faithful.”

If the Lord desires to use us, as He does, for His glory and the furtherance of the Gospel of Christ, wouldn’t it just be wise, to be ready? If I was asked to sing a special next Sunday, wouldn’t it be smart to practice? Or if I needed to fix something, to make sure I had all the right tools? I wouldn’t avoid culinary skills in the kitchen and then start working in a four-star restaurant. There is wisdom in being ready for what the Lord wants you to do.

“Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands. For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (II Timothy 1:6-7)

“Nothing is small or great in God’s sight; whatsoever He wills becomes great to us, however seemingly trifling, and if once the voice of conscience tells us that He requires anything of us, we have no right to measure its importance. On the other hand, whatever He would not have us do, however important we may think it, is as nought to us. How do you know what you may lose by neglecting this duty, which you think so trifling, or the blessing which its faithful performance may bring? Be sure that if you do your very best in that which is laid upon you daily, you will not be left without sufficient help when some weightier occasion arises. Give yourself to Him, trust Him, fix your eye upon Him, listen to His voice, and then go on bravely and cheerfully.” (Jean Nicolas Grou- “Daily Strength for Daily Needs” P.24)

Faithfulness in the little things, that can often be overlooked, is very important. Because even though it may feel a “small thing”- it is equally of the same importance to Him. We cannot deem anything small, that He deems of great importance, even when men do. The Lord told me, not long ago, that He wanted me to learn the piano. I don’t honestly know for what reason, He didn’t give one. He didn’t have to. But I know He has a good reason for it. Somewhere, sometime, someday, He wants to use that ability. To neglect it, would be disobedience. It would also be throwing away an opportunity to be used of the Lord in a way I don’t know of yet. And it would not only affect me, but others also. What blessing may we be forfeiting, what opportunity lost? Anytime the Lord has asked something specifically of me, I’ve always been glad I listened and gave it. He is a master planner and knows what I do not. He is trustworthy as He is worthy of all we are and all we possess. However, this doesn’t even include the idea of natural talents and abilities He has given to us, which can either be sad nothingness or gateways of opportunity for Him. What a blessing it might be if we were to develop our natural, God-given abilities and talents. For some, it could be musical talent or artistic ability. A gift for learning languages or writing books. Maybe even certain personality traits or physical differences. The list is endless as it is personal. Often times, He’s given us even those little desires of our hearts for a good reason. Not that “every desire” we have is a good desire. But the desires that are from Him. (Psalms 37) And Philippians 2:13 says- “For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.” So if it is true, that the more we prepare the more He is able to use, why aren’t we preparing?

“It is by doing our duty that we learn to do it. So long as men dispute whether or no a thing is their duty, they get never the nearer. Let them set ever so weakly about doing it, and the face of things alters. They find in themselves strength which they knew not of. Difficulties which it seemed to them they could not get over, disappear. For He accompanies it with the influences of His blessed Spirit, and each performance opens our minds for larger influxes of His grace, and places them in communion with Him.” (E. B. Pusey, “Daily Strength for Daily Needs” P.22)

I Peter 3:15 says- “But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:”

The Lord has commanded us to be ready to give an answer for the hope that lieth within us. There is nothing “optional” about that verse. We are told to be ready. Recently, the Lord gave me a special opportunity to witness to someone. As my family was traveling down to California, we all took our designated seats on the airplane. It wasn’t a very full flight and only maybe ¾ or so of the seats were actually taken. So I made my way to 15B. My sister sat beside me. And then, “Cindy”. A middle-aged woman with short sandy-blond hair and a very sad and lonely, but independent, feeling about her. Here were all these empty seats… but the Lord had her sit in 15C. And He had a reason. I didn’t feel very social or talkative, but we started up a conversation regardless. Mostly small chit-chat at first. She was a very lonely person. Experienced “life” to the fullest meaning of the word and found it wanting. She was curious. She listened. She asked questions. So for over 2 hours I talked and witnessed to her. She believed in a “god” (basically a higher power of some sort or religion), but knew nothing about Jesus. I was struck by the realization that people literally don’t know. And I know that many are willingly ignorant, but others, have honestly never heard. Hurts my heart. So I laid out the gospel from the beginning. I shared my personal testimony. She could tell there was something different about me. She remarked how she knew she didn’t have what I had. She admitted that she was a sinner, but still was trusting blindly in a “good vs. bad” heavenly scale. This was when my sister joined our conversation. I’ve never seen someone with so much conviction with nowhere to go. But the more His Spirit brought conviction, the more she seemed to listen. I was thankful for that. In the end, I gave her a “DONE book”. (A short little book that explains the gospel really well.) She was interested enough to tell me that she’d read it. And although I may never see “Cindy” again in this life- I honestly suspect that I maybe will in the next.

“…and be ready always to give an answer.” I believe the biggest part to being “ready” to share Christ with someone is in knowing Him personally for yourself. It is easy to talk about someone you love. To tell someone about a person you know. I've never hesitated to tell anyone that I have a physical earthly father. Because I know him. I believe another important part to being “ready” is simply by being willing. When we are completely surrendered to Him and filled with His Spirit, He delights to open the doors, to bring someone into your life or along the way in His timing. Seeds can be sown. Hearts can be stirred. Souls can be saved. I know that if we asked- we’d receive. And if we dared to knock, He’d open the door. I am amazed and blessed at how often He gives me the words to say. It wasn't something I rehearsed of myself. When we depend on Him, He’ll give us the courage needed and our words can be His words. And with this dependence, came a confidence and a boldness I hadn't experienced before. I wasn't afraid, because I knew He was with me. I didn't feel a panic to think of the right response to a question. He gave the answers. He wants to talk to that lost soul more than I do and He knows just how to do it. It is His Spirit that draws. In a way, witnessing feels like jumping off a dock into deep, cold, and unknown water, just to find that there is really a solid rock on which to stand just beneath you all along. The initial jump is the hardest. One more thought that comes to my mind with being “ready”, is literal preparation. I was encouraged by how much scripture I actually knew without thinking about it. Knowing your Bible, studying and memorizing scripture, and even reading good books are all good ways to prepare.

“Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity. Till I come, give attendance to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. Neglect not the gift that is in thee, … Meditate upon these things; give thyself wholly to them; that thy profiting may appear to all. Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee.” (I Timothy 4:12-16)

Philippians 4:13 says- “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” We have everything we could ever need in Christ, in His strength. When He asks us to do something, He gives us the power to do it. If there is a lesson to be learned, He’s the best teacher. If He wants us to develop a certain useful skill or simply practice what we already know, He gives the ability. He’ll go before us. He promises to make a way, even in the wilderness.

Hannah W. Smith once wrote- “If He commands me to do a thing, I am sure He will give me the power of His Spirit to do it. His commands are not grievous, we are told, but surely they would be grievous if we were unable to obey them. It would have been grievous if God had commanded the children of Israel to go in and possess the land of Canaan, and knowing they were unable to do it, had not intended to supply them with power. But, in fact, His very command was the reason why they should have no fear in undertaking what He had told them to do.”

(“God is Enough” P. 138)

What is it you already know God has asked you to do? What aren’t you preparing for? Will you have a willing heart? A ready mind? And in doing so, allow Him to open the doors of blessed opportunity.