The
weight of heartaches long past
The Bible says in
Philippians 3:13 and 14 - “Brethren, I count not myself to have
apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting
those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things
which are before. I press toward the mark for the
prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
Bitterness is deceptive. It
comes in many different forms. It can be offenses and hurts, not so
easily forgotten. It might be direct anger towards another person. It
may be an upset towards an uncomfortable situation. It could even be
a subtle choice, to simply not let go of an old heartache or
depressing circumstance. I recently asked the Lord to search me. To
try me; to see if there be any wicked way in me. To see if I had
bitterness in my heart. It is a scary thing to pray, unless you mean
to deal seriously with God and those around you. And even still, it
can be a painful ripping of the deep roots surrounding your soul. But
by His grace, He dealt with me with tender and loving compassion. And
He did show me. The inward struggle of a heartache not so easily
forgotten. My own bitterness towards a dark circumstance in my life.
I hadn't “gotten over it” yet. And although I didn't know it, my
failure in “forgetting those things which are behind” was
hindering my “reaching forth unto those things which are
before”. My past was haunting my present. And my bitterness
towards this hard trial now past, was crippling my future. It felt as
if there was some kind of hold over who I am now. It became a
comfortable harbor of excuses for why I was acting the way I was.
Which, is scary. I sought the pity of others, and disregarded anyone
who didn't understand. It was a nasty place to be. Yet, it was also a
subtle place; for again, I honestly didn't know I was there. Not
until the Lord showed me. Trials are only for as season. They do not
last forever. They are not suppose to last forever. But I think
sometimes, we make them longer than God ever intended them to be,
simply because we are bitter towards our trials and refuse to let go
of our hurts. Pain becomes more comfortable than healing.
“Therefore if any man
be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away;
behold, all things become new. And all things are of God, who hath
reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the
ministry of reconciliation;”
(II
Corinthians 5: 17-18)
When
we are saved, we are made new creatures by Christ Jesus. And with
this new nature, comes a new power. A power which is able to state
that “old things are
passed away”.
It is a fact. And that “all
things become new”.
When we are in Christ, this applies to us. And it applies to our
bitter state also. We have
been given the power through Christ to “[forget]
those things which are behind”. We
have been promised the victory. We can lay it all down at Jesus' feet
and claim His forgiveness and healing. Burdens are still lifted at
Calvary.
“Nay,
in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that
loved us.”
(Romans
8:37)
There
is no denying that heartaches are bitterly painful. That some wounds
go too deep to even emotionally or verbally express. But, even when
we cannot explain, and still no other human could begin to
understand, God still knows our heartaches, our sorrows. And He is
ready to be our solace; ready to heal. Ready to forgive. He is
waiting to be our victory. To renew our hearts and minds in Christ
Jesus. And He is ready to begin yet again, with something new.
“Wherefore
seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of
witnesses, let us lay aside very weight, and the sin which doth so
easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set
before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith;
who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising
the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
(Hebrews 12: 1-2)
